Baptism

Tirfe was baptised on Friday night, no pictures but it was perfect.

She was baptised by our friend, who is a Lakota spiritual leader. We are so blessed. The ceremony was amazing. It began with the lighting of the fire and giving of tobacco, so many prayers for this little girl. I learned to make frybread, a beef and rice stew, and a traditional blueberry dessert (I can't remember the Lakota names for the dishes...). While I prepared the food, with guidance from my generous and amazing teachers, my job was to think of Tirfe and how much I love her- just to put that love into the food. This food would become part of the spirit plate for the night. My mom and the boys were there, as was Andy. Andy is a doorman for this lodge and sweats every Friday.

I am aware of the struggles Tirfe may face in her future as she searches for her own unique identity. I know she will struggle with grief in her life, an aching to know more, to touch and feel what she can not remember about those who first loved her in her life. I am acutely aware that I have much to learn to parent this daughter of mine in the way that she deserves. I know that we will be working on balancing everything we want Tirfe to experience and learn so that she can build a healthy and strong self-image. That's why nights like Friday bring me to tears when I see people embracing our family and weaving such a blanket of support around us. The love and support we have been offered is something I can't put into words, it is off the charts- amazing. What an honor. This little girl has so many hands of love surrounding her and supporting her in her journey through life, she is so loved, and I am humbled. My heart is swelling with gratitude today.

Part of me is sad that we don't have pictures to document the moment, but deep down I know that this story is one we need to share orally. Pictures aren't necessary, it is in her as it is in us and we will remember it with words just the same. I depend on pictures to express my heart much too often anyhow, it is an honor to carry this story for her until she knows it.